I don’t want my children to view me from behind.
I say that because I think one of the hardest things about being a working mom is having to walk away to go to work.
My son is at the age where meltdowns have started and you could find me wiping tears from my eyes the other day when I had to leave for work and he cried and held his little chunky arms out for me.
Don’t get me wrong, working and being a mom is bittersweet. In one way it’s an outlet when you just need something for yourself and human interaction but on the other end it’s one of the hardest things because you feel like you aren’t present enough.
My son is 11-months-old so he is SO close to taking those first few steps and through this whole first year that was my worst fear, not being present for all those big milestones.
In this crazy life and these even crazier times I think that’s the one thing all of us moms struggle with, being present as much as we can. And I don’t mean just being in the same room. I mean in the moment, doing whatever silly things our kids are doing and just really being there!
We have work, we have laundry overflowing, a house to clean and everything else in the world to do but I am learning all those things are important, yes. But being with your children, making little memories takes the win!
So here are five great ways to be present for your kids.
Family Day/Outing.
My son is still little but I still love having a family day! I know in this pandemic it’s hard to get out and about but really, staying at home counts too! Get some burgers and hotdogs, start the grill. Turn on the sprinkler/splashpad. Have a pool day. Start a bonfire and indulge in tons of smore’s. Set up a projector in the backyard for a movie night. Go for a walk or to the park. Have a game night. Summertime is the easiest way to have family day’s so make the most of it!
Put Your Phone Away.
This is the biggest thing I am working on right now. Keeping my volume on incase of emergency but just setting it aside for the day. The last thing I want is my son to view me from behind a screen. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram can all wait until nap time or bedtime. I know how much of a struggle it is though, I am having a hard time staying away from my phone as well. Which makes me want to even more though, because it’s so sad how much these phones have taken over!
Find Fun House Chores Your Kids Will Help With.
I remember growing up, I used to love to help my nana clean up her house. I don’t know if it was because I was involved and felt like I was helping out but to this day I still enjoy cleaning! So find things your kids want to help you with around the house, even if it’s simple. You may be surprised at what they end up enjoying and helping with when given a chance!
Make Sure Your Ears Are Open.
I think one thing children want the most is for adults to listen to them. Like for us, communication is so important. Kids love to babble on about everything. Even our baby babbles, they love you to listen to them. To focus on them. Just listening is an easy way to be present with your children. Learn about their day, what they are thinking, even if it’s just for 10 minutes.
It also opens up that area of being able to know what is going on, especially with your teens. It gives you a chance to ask questions, and to just be involved. Listening is such a crucial thing when being a parent.
Self-Care.
You’ve probably seen a lot about self-care floating around lately. Have you ever had those days or weeks where your frustration takes over and you just can’t be there for anyone because you don’t even have time to be there for yourself? Yeah, me too! So that is why self-care plays such a huge role in parenting. To be able to be fully present with your children, to take care of them and do fun things with them you need to first take care of yourself.
Have a cup of coffee and turn your show on for an hour. Take a bubble bath. Read a book you’ve heard so many good things about. Buy a new outfit. Take a walk.
Self-care doesn’t have to be hard, and it really helps you focus back on what’s important, yourself and your family and not focus on the negative.
There are so many ways to be present with your kids. I am going to try my hardest to use all these tips and really make the most out of this Summer with my bub!
Giving our full attention to our children when we are home or spending a day with them should be easy, not hard!
Do you use any of these tips to be more present with your children?
If you have any other tips, please share them with us!

Keeping Phone away is one thing i have been doing consciouscly with both my kids. I know mobiles steal our precious time with our kids.
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Yes!!! Iβm trying my hardest to just leave it in another room with the ringer on
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Put your phone away is one that drives me mad – when I used to collect Flora from nursery I’d see mums on their phones while their kids were desperately trying to tell them what they’d done that day. It actually hurt to watch! Great tips and post, thank you π Lisa
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Yes!!! Thatβs what Iβm seeing to and itβs changing my ways now that I am a mom for sure. Thank you so much!
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Amazing post! Thank you for sharing!
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Thank you so much!
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I absolutely loved this. I think in life in general we need to learn to be more present with our family members and simply putting our phones down and listening to them and doing activities together (even if itβs chores haha) , can make such a huge difference !
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YES! I agree 100%! Trying really hard to do that way more. Thanks for readingπ
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Put that phone away! It’s so important because you usually don’t realize how much attention you’re giving it.
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Yesssss! So right! Thanks for reading π
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You have great tips here.
Remember you will see most of your sonβs firsts even if you do miss a couple. Itβs being involved with him that heβll remember not whether you saw his first steps.
Self care is what I struggle with the most. There is just do much to do!
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You are so right!! Thank you. Ugh I know itβs a bit downfall of mine too, life just gets so busy!
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Listening is so so so important! This is a great post that so many parents can benefit from
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Yes!! Thanks so much π
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I don’t have kids but I’ll take this and apply it to my own life with the people I love. Amazing how just putting your phone elsewhere can make such a difference.
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It really does make a huge difference! Thank you for reading π
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Amazing post… listening and keeping the phone away is priceless when it comes to spending time with family and friends. It just makes me sad when I see people on their phone when someone is trying to talk to them. Thanks for sharing
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I agree, I get so sad when I see that too! Thank you for reading π
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This is such a great post. It is so easy to feel overwhelmed by work and life but remembering that our children need us, want us is so important.
I have loved spending so much time with my children during the corona outbreak. Long may it continue x
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I loved those precious moments too! It was so hard to go back after being able to spend so much time at home. Thank you so much for reading π
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All of your tips are so important. I always try to remember that the one time I forget to look up from my phone while my child is talking is the one time his or her feelings get hurt. They need a lot of love and attention at all ages. Everything else can wait.
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Yesss! Thatβs my fear too! They definitely do thatβs for sure π
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Wow, I absolutely love this post. Iβm not a mom yet but spending too much time on my phone scares me – I want to make sure Iβm fully engaged with my child. And the fact that you pointed out just listening to them as being more present: YES! Sometimes we forget itβs the little things that make the biggest impact!
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I know, after becoming a mom I realized how much of a distraction phoneβs really are. It is scary! Thank you so much for reading π
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I think it is awesome to make kids a part of household chores. If they see you doing little things, they usually learn to help out on their own and it is a nice way to spend time together. I know I loved talking with my mom when I started cooking in the kitchen. π
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Yes!! Same, I would always help my dad in the kitchen when I was younger as well.
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Very well written! As a toddler teacher, I understand families’ feeling of not wanting to miss anything that goes on in their children’s lives. As part of my center’s curriculum, we are required to use an electronic communication system called TadPoles that gets sent out to the families every day. In this system, we write down all of the children’s daily information including meals (including the portions of what they ate), diaper changes, lesson activities, important notes, and we even are required to take at least one picture/video of the children every day that gets sent out to their families. I take pictures and videos of the children’s milestones so that while their families could not physically be there to see it, they can still have a chance to watch the first time.
I have also observed on the job as a teacher that encouraging children to do fun jobs is also a great idea. When I was a floater, the older children would always want to help me clean after meals and since they loved doing it so much, I always let them. In my first year of teaching, I also had a student who always wanted to do hand-ons helping jobs with me and so I would always let him. This technique also helps with children’s self-esteem and behavior management.
In addition, I completely agree that all caregivers need to take care of themselves too to take care of and be there for children. For some reason, there is a common misconception that self-care is selfish when it is not at all. If it is what helps someone, then its not selfish. Not all but many people with mental health conditions also find it this to be very calming. It does not matter how we self-care either as long as it is positive and beneficial in the end.
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So awesome!! That is such a great curriculum addition, Iβve never heard of it before but I would love it. Thank you so much for your input! Iβm so happy you agree with a lot of these methods. Thanks for reading π
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This is great! I especially love “put your phones away” I feel so sad when I see parents on their phones and their children trying to get their attention. As an empty nestor I can tell you the time passes way too fast! Cherish each moment.
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I get sad too!! Awe yes I am defiantly going to cherish every moment. Thank you for reading!π
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Iβm not a mom, but I like reading parenting articles like this to have a better idea on how to give advice to my friends who are parents when they are in need of help. These are some really helpful tips!
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Thank you so much! π
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These are all such great ways to be more present with your children! It’s definitely so important to do that while they are growing up!
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I think so too! Thank you for reading π
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Great post. Days out are the best, discovering somewhere new with the kids is so much fun.
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Yes! Iβm excited for new adventures this summer with my little one!
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That’s great! I try to follow all these points..
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Awesome! Thanks for reading π
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Truly great ways to help connect more with your kids. Putting the phone away is a huge one, I have seen so many parents ignore their kids because they are too busy with their phone. A day is not only great for the kids but the parents too. Getting out of the house for even a short time can be great, especially if it involves a bonding activity.
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Exactly!! I know I am refreshed after a day outside or doing something fun with the family. Thanks for reading π
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Totally agree with every single points you mentioned..they need our presence more than anything and it really does take lots of conscious effort
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I think so too!! Thank you for reading π
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Couldn’t agree more. I wrote a similar list for dads. https://yearofthedad.com/five-simple-tips-for-being-a-better-father/
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Awesome! Left you a comment π
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