Reality Vs. Expectation- Being a Parent.

You know how when we were little and were playing house and you would dream of a beautiful picture perfect life with a spouse and 3 children living in a mansion just happy as can be? Cooking up breakfast, lunch and dinner every day on your little plastic kitchen set?

Well, all of that can defiantly happen but the reality of what your days are actually like vs. what you used to dream about??

Totally different!

Am I right?

Today I would love to talk about reality vs. expectation in the parenting world. I feel like we expect so much but then get disappointed when the outcome is different and it’s totally normal but we need to embrace the reality, because this parenting gig? Hardest thing in the world but it is just the best ever!


Expectation- My children will never throw a tantrum in aisle 5 at the grocery store.

My child will be perfect and never show their feelings or have a meltdown because that’s just embarrassing.

Reality…

HA HA…..hahaha. The minute you said no coco puffs was the minute you lost that perfection battle. Tantrums are so normal and you just have to embrace them. Haven’t you ever had a meltdown in aisle 5? You might not have shown it the same way, maybe you had a quiet one because you were so tired from working all day but had to go to the grocery store anyway. It’s just how feelings are shown and kids just like us have every right to feel…even if it is embarrassing.

Expectation- Social Media.

I made this homemade perfect meal, I must post on Instagram. My baby just can’t stop smiling right now, always so happy! I cleaned the whole entire house, I need to show it off.

Reality…

Bribing is just the best way to get great pictures I will tell you that! Oh and that perfect clean house? Yeah…that is just one area, you should see the rest of it! That perfect homemade meal I made? Only happens about once a week….if that. Social media can be so toxic, I promise you that all the perfect mama’s you think are on there all have the reality of daily life happening as well so remember…DO NOT COMPARE!

Expectation- What my kids eat.

All organic, no added sugar, fruits and veggies galore.

Reality…

Oh my goodness, I thought I could be a total organic mom and I do try to as much as I can and my son does love fruit but I mean lets get real. This kid also loves French fries and popsicles and that’s ok too!

Expectation- I will not change after having children.

I will still have my social life and pamper myself and eat healthy and exercise just like I am right now.

Reality…

Oh man this was a big one for me. More on the social life, I can’t believe how hard it is to keep up a social life with children. I feel like there isn’t even enough hours in the day to go to work and come home and be a mom and a wife! My body has changed, my thinking has changed, my whole life has changed and I am defiantly not who I was before having my baby and you know what? THAT’S OK!

Expectation- Being a mom.

I will have it all together all the time. I will be able to balance my life perfectly. I will find the joy in every situation and be the best mom ever.

Reality…

Most nights I will cry with a glass of wine wondering what I am doing wrong. I will think, how am I supposed to handle all of this? Working and being a mom just aren’t doable and I just can’t stop feeling guilty all of the time!


The Truth…

The truth is being a parent is hard. I rarely go to the bathroom alone these days. I don’t get more than a quick 5 minute shower most of the time. I feel like I am constantly cleaning or washing bottles or doing laundry and most of the time? I am just exhausted beyond repair and when I wake up in the morning? I still feel exhausted but do it all over again.

All these expecations we put out there? They just aren’t reality. They shouldn’t be though. Life isn’t perfect, whether you are a mom or not. That’s what makes life with these little’s so fun though. Yes they deserve our best, but sometimes it just dosen’t happen and that’s ok! Give yourself a break mama, you are doing amazing and you need to remember that!

Give into all of those cuddles, all of the boo boo kisses and the giggles and hugs. Also give into all the cries, the tantrums, the feet stomping and the yells because this life we call motherhood?

It’s worth it all!

To The Little Boy Who Made Me A Mom.

To the little boy who made me a mom, 

I feel like it was just yesterday that I saw those two lines on the pregnancy test. 

When the kicks and the excitement of hearing your heartbeat was like no other feeling.

When my water broke and your daddy and I had a panic attack thinking, “this is really happening. We are parents.” 

When I held you in my arms for the first time. 

When daddy and I were wondering how in the world we were going to be able to do this at home on our own. 

Your sweet smiles and cuddles have been the absolute light of each day. 

Watching you grow and learn and be the sweet, outspoken, adventurous little boy that you are has been the best ever. 

Through these uncertain times, you and your daddy have been the constant joy I needed. And I would be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous for you to grow up in this world. 

As we approach your first birthday on Friday (silently crying) I can’t help but think of all the things I want to teach you.

You’re so sweet and innocent and I love being a mommy to such a precious, wild boy. As you grow I want you to know things, especially in the world we are living in now and even more so when you are older.

Your feelings matter. You matter and don’t ever forget that. 

Dream big and chase those dreams because we will always be there chasing them with you. 

Be kind. Always. People will always remember the way you treated them. 

Treat everyone equally and don’t be afraid to. 

Be whoever and whatever you want to be. You are forever supported. 

No always means no, no matter what. 

Stand up for what you believe in, your voice is always heard.

Use the words, “I love you” wisely. Three small words that have the biggest meaning. 

Choose good friends, they have such an impact on your life. 

Know that you will forever be loved, supported and taken care of, I promise you that.

I am so lucky to be your mama. I just want you to know that I will be there always, no matter what. 

I pinky promise. 

Love, 

Your mama 

5 Ways To Be More Present With Your Children.

I don’t want my children to view me from behind.

I say that because I think one of the hardest things about being a working mom is having to walk away to go to work.

My son is at the age where meltdowns have started and you could find me wiping tears from my eyes the other day when I had to leave for work and he cried and held his little chunky arms out for me.

Don’t get me wrong, working and being a mom is bittersweet. In one way it’s an outlet when you just need something for yourself and human interaction but on the other end it’s one of the hardest things because you feel like you aren’t present enough.

My son is 11-months-old so he is SO close to taking those first few steps and through this whole first year that was my worst fear, not being present for all those big milestones.

In this crazy life and these even crazier times I think that’s the one thing all of us moms struggle with, being present as much as we can. And I don’t mean just being in the same room. I mean in the moment, doing whatever silly things our kids are doing and just really being there!

We have work, we have laundry overflowing, a house to clean and everything else in the world to do but I am learning all those things are important, yes. But being with your children, making little memories takes the win!

So here are five great ways to be present for your kids.


Family Day/Outing.

My son is still little but I still love having a family day! I know in this pandemic it’s hard to get out and about but really, staying at home counts too! Get some burgers and hotdogs, start the grill. Turn on the sprinkler/splashpad. Have a pool day. Start a bonfire and indulge in tons of smore’s. Set up a projector in the backyard for a movie night. Go for a walk or to the park. Have a game night. Summertime is the easiest way to have family day’s so make the most of it!

Put Your Phone Away.

This is the biggest thing I am working on right now. Keeping my volume on incase of emergency but just setting it aside for the day. The last thing I want is my son to view me from behind a screen. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram can all wait until nap time or bedtime. I know how much of a struggle it is though, I am having a hard time staying away from my phone as well. Which makes me want to even more though, because it’s so sad how much these phones have taken over!

Find Fun House Chores Your Kids Will Help With.

I remember growing up, I used to love to help my nana clean up her house. I don’t know if it was because I was involved and felt like I was helping out but to this day I still enjoy cleaning! So find things your kids want to help you with around the house, even if it’s simple. You may be surprised at what they end up enjoying and helping with when given a chance!

Make Sure Your Ears Are Open.

I think one thing children want the most is for adults to listen to them. Like for us, communication is so important. Kids love to babble on about everything. Even our baby babbles, they love you to listen to them. To focus on them. Just listening is an easy way to be present with your children. Learn about their day, what they are thinking, even if it’s just for 10 minutes.

It also opens up that area of being able to know what is going on, especially with your teens. It gives you a chance to ask questions, and to just be involved. Listening is such a crucial thing when being a parent.

Self-Care.

You’ve probably seen a lot about self-care floating around lately. Have you ever had those days or weeks where your frustration takes over and you just can’t be there for anyone because you don’t even have time to be there for yourself? Yeah, me too! So that is why self-care plays such a huge role in parenting. To be able to be fully present with your children, to take care of them and do fun things with them you need to first take care of yourself.

Have a cup of coffee and turn your show on for an hour. Take a bubble bath. Read a book you’ve heard so many good things about. Buy a new outfit. Take a walk.

Self-care doesn’t have to be hard, and it really helps you focus back on what’s important, yourself and your family and not focus on the negative.


There are so many ways to be present with your kids. I am going to try my hardest to use all these tips and really make the most out of this Summer with my bub!

Giving our full attention to our children when we are home or spending a day with them should be easy, not hard!

Do you use any of these tips to be more present with your children?

If you have any other tips, please share them with us!

Top Five Genius Mom Hacks!

After becoming a mom, I love finding any useful hack that I can to make days just a little bit easier.

The days can be long with our kiddo’s but I am forever grateful for the genius mamas out there who have come up with some amazing mom hacks (Motherhood Sprouting)! I swear I spend lots of Pinterest time just scrolling through hacks and trying them out.

I will also tell you, my mind is blown by most of them.

So today I thought I would share with you the best mom hacks I have found and you will most likely be like me and think, HOW HAVE I NOT DONE THESE SOONER!?

Let’s check them out!


Bathe Your Baby In A Laundry Basket.

I know, I know sounds so weird! But I am telling you guys, I have huge anxiety about my wild 11 month old slipping in the tub and hitting his head so I have been trying to find the best way to give baths without an injury and when I saw this hack a lightbulb instantly went off in my mind.

THIS IS GENIOUS! And I can’t wait to try it because not only will it help with my slipping fear but his toys will stay right by him as well so he won’t try to venture out to get them.

Love Love Love Blog

Use Tape To Prevent Doors From Locking.

Another one of my fears as my son is getting taller and more curious is locking himself in a room! Right now he is so into climbing on doors and swinging them back and forth so once he starts walking around and can reach door knobs I am so using this hack to hopefully prevent any breaking down doors in the house.

Kids Activities Blog

DIY Stain Remover.

I just tried this on old sweet potato and carrot stains on my sons clothes and WOW! I am telling you genius, and so easy! No other stain remover that I tried to use fully got those orangey stains out so I am so happy I found this!

Mix a little and equal parts of hydrogen peroxide, dawn dish soap and baking soda together. Let it sit for a little bit and throw it in the washer! Magic, I am telling you 🙂

Attach Cupcake Holders To Your Popsicle Sticks.

It’s Summer and popsicles are all the rage with the kids. The sticky mess though afterwards? Not so fun, especially when you are out in public so how awesome is this hack? I can’t tell you how many unused cupcake holders I have sitting around so this is on my to-try list when giving my son his first popsicle.

Mom Loves Best

Put Water In A Pacifier And Freeze For Teething Relief.

Oh teething! THE WORST! My son started teething very early, as soon as he turned 4 months. He just turned 11 months and now has 8 teeth! So I can tell you, this is an awesome hack! Something to defiantly try on your teething baby.

Love Love Love Blog

Mom hacks can be total life-savers and we need as many as we can get.

Do you use any of these hacks yourself? Be sure to let us know the best hacks you have used that work.

Why Are We So Quick To Compare Ourselves To Others?

Every morning when I sip my coffee I take some time alone to scroll through Instagram.

It’s maybe been ten seconds and I find myself scrunching up my nose and whispering, “how does she get her baby to sleep 12 hours every single night!?”

Or, “How in the world does this mom of three look put together every day when as a mom of one, I struggle to just blow dry my hair most days?”

I know I am not alone in this world of comparing and criticizing ourselves.

It’s just human nature.

No matter how much we talk about it though, why is there such a craving to still show only the glamourous on social media?

You never see the dark circles from night time feedings, from bad dreams that meant a night with a shared bed or just from no sleep at all because your mind won’t shut off.

You only see the beautiful hair, not the Ms. Trunchbull buns you know we all rock at least a couple times a week.

The unworthiness and the just not good enough comes on strong, and it lasts long as well.

We are all so unique though, and I think that’s an important thing to remember when you are a woman and a mom.

Sure, the girl you knew in High School might have a fabulous kitchen and the latest home upgrades, but she might not have the awesome cooking skills to utilize that wonderful kitchen like you do.

And yes, the mom who’s baby sleeps 12 hours each night is beyond lucky, but she also doesn’t get those 3am snuggles that even though you are dead tired, you cherish those snuggles with your baby.

Everyone has different strengths and your mind is one of them and maybe even the most important. Think of the positives in your life when you find yourself jealous of a positive in someone else’s life. The uniqueness that makes you, you.

I am just as guilty as anyone else when it comes to comparing myself to others, it’s a habit that sure is hard to break.

Instead of feeling sorry for myself or being jealous, I am going to try to better the areas in my life that have me feeling that way.

So next time you see those flawless Instagram pics, give yourself a break and remember what you bring to the table.

Don’t be so quick to compare and know that you are enough.

You are valued, and you are just as worthy!

What I Wish Everyone Actually Shared About Becoming A Mom

Say goodbye to sleeping in, oh and your sanity? That goes out the window as well. Oh, oh and you will be up to your neck in diapers and spit up like 24/7.

And the cries, oh the cries will be stuck in your head forever. Oh, and teething? Yeah, have fun with that!

Yes, I heard about the sleepless nights, the teething, the horror stories of giving birth. We all have and yes, those things are all true that we are constantly reminded of when pregnant and carrying around a newborn.

Fast forward 10 months in though, and there’s so much I have figured out on my own that I just don’t think is talked about as much as it should be and I’m hoping I am not the only one who has felt these things.


No one ever told me how emotional I would be about every little thing. Hormones or not every milestone, every new thing learned, ever little smile and new tooth. Well let’s just say there are secret flood works every single time. Sure I knew becoming a mom would be nothing but emotions, but I just didn’t know it would be over everything and I mean EVERYTHING.

No one ever told me about the frustration. Your baby wakes up in the middle of the night for the 4th night in a row. Nothing you do eases that teething pain. Every time you set the baby down, the water works start. The frustration is real and I never knew how many times I would need a breather throughout the day. How many times I would have to take deep breaths so I don’t break down. How much of a zombie I would feel like just to get through the day.

No one ever told me about the guilt…Oh the guilt. Mom guilt is the worst thing in the whole entire world and it is so REAL. Every time that frustration comes, every time my baby doesn’t sleep through the night, every time I just want to have time for myself I feel consumed with guilt. Which I now know is such a normal thing, but mom guilt needs to be talked about more because it’s a terrible thing to hold inside!

No one ever told me how much I would need my husband and my tribe. You single moms doing it ALL on your own, hats off to you. Seriously you are the real MVP because I don’t think I could do it. To have someone I can just silently hand little man off to so I can grab a glass of wine at the end of the night is everything. When the frustration becomes too much or I just need alone time with my husband, to have our tribe of family and friends is EVERYTHING.

No one ever told me I would meet someone new. And no, not my baby, I am talking about myself. Sometimes I just feel like a totally different person. My views have changed since becoming a mom, my feelings are more intense. My body has changed, along with so many other parts of me. But it’s ok, I like this vesion of myself and I like the other version too when I get to be baby free for a night or two.

No one ever told me how much you can love someone. From the moment I saw “pregnant” on my pregnancy test, I instantly fell in love. I never knew how much you could love someone without even know them or seeing them yet. And when you do get the chance to peek at that little face? I can’t even describe it as I’m sure all you moms felt it too. I just never knew how much unconditional love you could give out to this tiny little person you are helping grow. It’s amazing and it needs to be shared more often.


I feel like no book could have prepared me for motherhood, you learn so much on your own because every baby is truly different.

It could never tell me how guilty and sad I would feel every time I have to leave for work or that most of the time I am honestly just winging it. It’s scary not knowing what kind of mother you will be, but just know that you are and will do your best! In the end, they just need our unconditional love and care.

Making Time For Self-Care As A Busy Mom

Putting yourself last, I feel like that’s a mom mantra.

We are so busy taking care of our little ones that by the end of the day we barley have enough energy to make it under the covers. Which I know, because I am guilty of it myself.

Being a first time mom, I find myself trying to pack a million tasks into one day. Instead of sitting down and enjoying a simple hot cup of coffee during nap time I am running around switching out laundry, folding laundry.

Seriously though who else hates laundry!? By far a moms worst nightmare.

Vacuuming, picking up toys, emptying the dishwasher…

It’s like there is not enough hours in the day for some me-time and sometimes there really isn’t.

Trust me mama’s, you are not alone in this.

The thing is though, self-care isn’t a treat, it is a necessity.

We need it.

To be a better mom, to be a better partner, to be a better person.

These little ones have the power to drain us, but we need to have the power to take care of ourselves.

So luckily, with Mother’s Day coming up on Sunday I am here to give you some great self-care ideas that are sure to make you feel a little more refreshed.


Sleep In

Doesn’t it just make a HUGE difference? Sleep has such a big impact on your body and the way you feel, so for your well-being and mental health, get some extra sleep as much as you can.

Read A Book

Some of you who know me already probably could have guessed this would be on my self-care list. I love reading and I try everyday to sneak away to get a couple pages read in the book I am currently reading, which is, Where The Crawdads Sing and it is AMAZING.

Drink A HOT Cup Of Coffee Or Tea

Seems like such a simple task. For most moms this is probably a long ago wished for thing, but me being a new mom since my son is only 9 months old it’s still fresh for me. I miss a hot cup of coffee! I don’t like having to re-heat the same cup five times in the span of 30 min. So yes people, being able to sit on the couch with a hot cup of coffee or tea is most defiantly on my self-care list.

A Mini Spa Night

See if your partner will hold the fort down for bedtime routines. Run a hot bubble bath, put that new face mask on, moisturize your skin, paint your nails. You will feel like a million bucks after a night of pampering yourself.

Write In A Journal

You may have already figured this out, but I love writing. I try as much as I can to write down all my thoughts, all my worries, my happiness in journals or by blogging. It helps so much and it’s so relaxing to curl up on the couch or in bed and write your heart out.

Light A Candle Or Diffuse Essential Oils

So relaxing, and you know what? while you are at it turn on the Netflix or Hulu show you need to catch up on.

Take A Walk

During this crazy quarantine situation this has defiantly been one of my biggest self-care things I have done. It just refreshes your whole mindset and burns off nervous energy in these uncertain times.


The list could go on and on but the most important thing is to find something that helps you feel like yourself again and make time during the week to do it!

Being at home all the time right now, it is so needed and you know what?

We deserve it!

Now if you will excuse me, my self-care is going to start with a glass of white wine tonight!

Thanks for stopping by!

Hot Mess Mom

If you are a hot mess mom, raise your hand!

Here I am, two different blog posts written (but not completed), running around the house doing laundry, while feeding the girls a bedtime snack at 10:15pm! My life never ends as a mom. Motherhood for me looks like this on a daily basis. Balancing working, cooking, cleaning, play with the girls, doing “school” work, it’s the season I am in and I am LOVING it.

I love being a hot mess mom. I know that sounds super crazy to some. OF COURSE I would love to have a daily schedule, get work outs in, meal plan, but living with no schedule has allowed me to enjoy every moment that I’m in with my family.


Obviously we are in the middle of this global pandemic. I don’t want to talk too much about it, but during this time, I’ve really been able to sit back and enjoy the life that I have. However, to make sure I don’t lose my mind or the kids theirs, I did set myself some ground rules.

Sleep “Schedule”

I set an alarm for eight o’clock every morning. We’re letting the girls go to bed a little later, so they sleep in a little. Waking up at eight allows me to watch some t.v. and drink my coffee. I also try to get to bed by 11.

School Work

All school work has to be done by noon. Then we have lunch, and the rest of the day is free time! The kids are LOVING that they don’t do school work for 7 hours a day.

House Work

My hubby and I really have tackled this together. We try to get dishes and laundry done while the girls are doing school work, so we can enjoy that free time as well!


I am a hot mess mom, and I am proud to be it! Our life isn’t perfect, but it was perfectly made for me.

Today’s blog post was supposed to be a recipe for my family’s favorite sweet treat: edible cookie dough (YUM!), but once again being a hot mess mom, everything in the universe stopped me from doing it!

However, it will be here next Thursday, so don’t forget to stop back by!

Welcome To Quirky Workin’ Moms!

Hello everyone, we are so happy you dropped by on our new blog!

We just wanted to take a few minutes of your time to say hi and introduce ourselves and what you can expect from Quirky Workin’ Moms.

Meet the moms behind Quirky Workin’ Moms.

We are Amanda and Marissa. We both live in Michigan and we are actually family by marriage but best friends by choice. We both work in Optometry and love it and you guessed it we are both moms!

Here is a little about what we both will be bringing to the table on this new blogging adventure.


I’ll start off, I’m Amanda.

I’m twenty-six and married to the biggest sports fanatic. We have a sweet 9 month old baby boy named Easton. He currently runs the house even though he can’t even walk yet. I’ve actually been blogging for about five years now and when Marissa & I decided to start Quirky Workin’ Moms I was excited to jump right in! I love spending time with my family, devouring romance and thriller novels, eating cheeseburgers and having the occasional glass of wine or margarita when I’m out and about. I’m excited to bring to you the struggles of being a first-time mom, the happiness with hitting every new milestone and just what juggling being a wife, a mother and working full-time is like for me. So I hope you will stick around and be sure to check out my posts every Monday.

Hi! I’m Marissa,

I’m twenty-eight, I married my high school sweetheart, and we have two of the most beautiful girls. When Amanda approached me about writing a motherhood blog, I just could not resist. I enjoy baking and doing crafts with my girls. I’m excited to learn more about my most recent hobby: gardening. As a mom of two older girls, 9 & 6 (and a 1/2), I want to show you that those long nights with the teething baby to those long days with a crazy and sassy toddler are worth it. That what you do in those first few years, will cultivate your children to be little ladies, and little gentleman! I’m so excited you’re here, and can’t wait to share with you the many adventures of motherhood. Be sure to check out my posts every Thursday.


Here on Quirky Workin’ Moms you will find real life parenting tips, fun family activities, family recipes that are kid and baby friendly. You will get first time mom stories to seasoned mom advice with two school aged kids and lots of every day life chit chat in between.

So grab a glass of wine every Monday and Thursday night and follow along with us Quirky Workin’ Moms! We are so happy you are here 🙂

Other ways to connect and follow

Instagram

Twitter

Facebook